Leaders Can Help Their Missions by Helping Themselves

Kelly Campbell is a Trauma-Informed Leadership Coach with Agency Growth Consultant LLC,
and is also the Founder of Conscious Leaders

What would be your response as a leader to hearing or reading that “leaders must heal to lead,” — and what would you think if you were a team member and heard that wisdom given to the authority figure in your organization?

In “Healing Trauma: Why It's Fundamental For Effective Leadership,” at Forbes.com, Kelly Campbell provides the insight on a much-needed conversation. A trauma-informed leadership coach with Agency Growth Consultant LLC, and founder of Conscious Leadership, Campbell writes in her piece, “Childhood trauma can follow people into adulthood and, therefore, can show up in various aspects of their individual leadership style, in the same way it can show up in personal relationships.”

The topic, ripe to be discussed.

She asserts that “Leaders who have not begun the healing journey from past traumatic experiences tend to be myopic and inflexible.”

It seems unlikely that the overwhelming majority of people in power are self aware that they, like most of us, require healing to be the who their followers need them to be and the mission requires. The questions that could come to mind are who successfully communicates this to them and how specifically — to where the message is received favorably, inspiring inward reflection and the commitment to becoming courageously vulnerable and pursuing necessary healing.

“Many leaders hit a wall somewhere along their journey where they recognize that they are unhappy,” Campbell says. “They may not recognize why, or what's happening, but relationships with people within their organization and-or in their personal lives may be strained, or aspects of their lives may feel stagnated or unnecessarily difficult. Though most don't immediately jump to the conclusion that something from their past is asking to be healed, most get to a point where they will try anything because they know something needs to change.”

She has learned that leaders can and often project their trauma and blind spots, yet they usually do so unconsciously.

“For example, leaders who embody a fear-based, scarcity mindset may be aggressive or passive-aggressive, dominant, demeaning, or act as micromanagers,” Campbell says. She goes back to what could have transpired in their youth and how it drives troublesome behavior that creates negative impact. “Leaders who did not feel valued or worthy during childhood may unconsciously devalue those within their organization. If they feel the need to prove their worth, they may take credit for other people's ideas or work, or they may believe that they need to have all of the answers and therefore never ask for input from their teams.”

To overcome this challenge well, Campbell recommends the difficult task of modeling vulnerability, which can be difficult for certain personalities to allow themselves to be. It’s scary and can feel like weakness. There is doubt of being judged unfavorably and losing trust and respect. Campbell says that this is when people must dig deep and access what’s necessary to do what needs to be done.

“Vulnerability takes courage when established leaders have adorned a mask of stoicism. For those who believe that they will be seen as weak, I recommend opening up about small things at first. If they don't typically ask for input from others, especially in a meeting setting, an easy entrance into vulnerability would be to say, ‘I'm not sure what the best way is to handle ‘X.’ Does anyone have any thoughts, suggestions or other information to consider?’ Modeling the idea that, as the leader, you don't always have the answers builds trust,” she says.

“When you're seen as human, it makes you more approachable. That, in turn, improves collaboration, innovation and culture overall,” Campbell adds.

Compassion is a skill, competency and strength that is not the requirement it should be in leadership.

“Having empathy is necessary —feeling with someone—but compassion is the motivation to relieve the suffering of others,” Campbell says. “It's the action orientation that's so important on the part of a leader. Developing compassion as an organizational standard comes from the top; this is why modeling core values like this one is so important. If you want a particular trait to become part of the fabric of a workplace culture, it must be consistently visible until it becomes a norm.”

Sabotage can be a signal in the workplace of trauma manifesting itself. It isn’t always easy for leaders to realize more that creating more leaders is vital to the strength of the organization and is a leadership responsibility, whether in the job description or not. Working through this ignorance or difficulty, adversity or resistance really, has to become a high-priority, mandatory task.

Campbell writes about it, “Healing from past trauma also means overcoming sabotage that keeps other people in the workplace stuck in position,” she begins, adding, “It means becoming the kind of leader who wants to see other people grow and inviting bold, audacious ideas that both support and challenge team members.”

Insecurity is underneath this challenge. A question for those in authority and power can become, “How can I and my fellow leaders get comfortable with recognizing sabotaging behavior and overcoming it by getting excited by empowering our people, giving them a bigger voice and creating a dynamic that makes the organization more powerful?”

“This is all about addressing the root of a leader's insecurity,” Campbell says. “Once we can begin to adopt an abundance mindset, we naturally become more collaborative versus competitive — and more generous versus believing that there is a finite amount of ‘X’ to go around.”

Moving from self-focus and satisfaction to a team-focus and people-centered leadership isn’t natural to everyone yet if that can become natural and accomplished, the potential benefits are significant.

“If we can do the inner work to shift our legacy from individualism to one of collective growth, then we will want to support, mentor and create more leaders—as opposed to stepping on others to ensure that we rise and remain at the top,” Campbell says.